Me and my mad skillz

If you thought my sissy Ethel was the only one in this house who knows her way around a tennis ball....
...you could not be more wrong.


I've got at least a two inch vertical.


And for tonight's disco pawty with the Girls of Jackman Ave, I've been practicing my faces.

So I can hang with Lola, my partner in snaggle.

Home on the Range!

I'm getting ready for Asta's cowboy hoedown burpday pawty and to get ready I've been listening to Sally Timms singing "Drunk by Noon" not only because it's something I like to be (drunk by noon) but also because the first line is about a poodle who thought he was a cowboy (sorry for the video quality):



My ma ape will be SO MAD I told you about this but one summer when she was in college she worked as country music DJ--haha! She can teach me how to be a cowboy. Though I think I'm going to be a cow so maybe she should teach me how to avoid the cowboys. But what if I want to wear chaps?

CSI: Backyard

Investigator: Inspector Wally

Crime Report: Dead possum spotted in backyard. Confirmed animal is not "playing possum" and is, in fact, dead as a doornail.

The Crime Scene: Backyard, near the fence.

Victim: Large Possum, estimated to be 6-7 pounds.

Suspects: Tall, leggy brunette named Ethel. O.J. Simpson.

Cause of Death: Unknown.

Investigator Conclusion: No lacerations or blood suggest natural causes, suicide, or overdose on pears that have fallen from the tree.

Action taken: Avoided area, fetched the ma ape to remove the carcass. Laughed at her gagging.

Busted!

The horrible carnage of squeaky toys has been blamed on a single culprit, the Wally.


Surveillance footage from this morning indicates he may have a partner in crime.


A weenie wailing accomplice, it seems.


The horror! The horror!

Oh crap, that's ma ape with the camera.

I Rule (and so do my friends)

So I got this totally awesome award from my friends Agatha and Archie. They're terriers I met in Sunday chatting.

It is a big burden cuz there are so many blogs I love but I think I'll pass it on to some of MY new friends--Randi and Balboa (aka, Boober!). And a couple of old friends, too! Marvin and Ruby Bleu--I love you!

Fetch Me My Lawyer!

My always helpful granny sent me a story about doggie lawyers! They handle important matters like inheritance and custody disputes:

The result has been the beginning of a qualitative shift - not merely the stiffening of animal cruelty laws, though in most states that has happened, but changes that are turning animals into legal beings with their own interests, and, in a few cases, their own enforceable preferences. Thirty-nine states and the District of Columbia now allow pet owners to endow pet trusts, the kind of legislation that made it possible for New York hotel billionaire Leona Helmsley to bequeath $12 million to her dog, Trouble. In some states, veterinarians are now required to report suspicions of animal abuse in the same way pediatricians have to report child abuse. Courts are starting to take seriously the claim that pet owners are entitled to compensation for pain and suffering in cases involving the death of an animal. And, in a Tennessee case this spring, a court appointed a legal guardian to represent the interests of a dog in a custody dispute.

I MOST DEFINITELY need a lawyer to handle my important business including managing my large estate of squeaky toys, securing my inheritance from my ma ape (don't worry ma ape, I wasn't really try to push you down the stairs, I swear!), and for suing the neighbor dog who always barks at me and runs away. Harassment! Also, I get relatively frequent sexual harassment on the Internets, though that might be because I'm always posting pictures of my bum. Also, I kind of like it.

Life's a B*tch, so's my Ma Ape

My granny sent me this story about this woman who rescued her dog from a python:

A Hong Kong woman kicked and punched a 4.5 metre (15 foot) Burmese python to wrest free her pet dog after the snake wrapped itself around it.

Catherine Leonard grappled with the python after it attacked Poppy during a walk in the Sai Kung country park

My granny asked my ma ape if she would do that for ME, that is, if she would put her life on the line for me. So I asked my ma ape. And SHE said "I did, just the other night." And I asked her what she meant. And she said "After you guys ate the pig bones you had pork butt!" And I said "SO?" And she said "Your flatulence could have downed an elephant, dudes!"

And then she said--no more pork bones. I'll let the python take her.

Shakin' it Off.

A picture is worth a thousand words. Maybe more.

A Day in the Life

Here is our photo essay about things we like to do in the out of doors. By Wally and Ethel.

We like to be adorable.


And I like to FETCH TENNIS BALLS


Let's go THIS WAY!


NO NO! THIS WAY!


I told you--my sissy is a bit mad.


While she fetches, I roach.

I've gotta sun my belly.


And here is my final parting shot.

(M)eat another day!

Last night this is how I looked:


But today is a new day and we look like this!


Why so happy? Well, it is still world cup soccer time so I played a little footie first thing in the morning: (Isn't this photo all arty farty. Or just poorly lit.)

And then we went in the outside to have BONES. From piggies.

Tasty! Yes, I am squinting in my photos. Maybe the sun was too bright. Maybe I was hung over. I'll never tell.


My sissy ate hers REALLY FAST.


And then we got to go play in the outside field!

Who do you think is faster? Ethel?


Or the Woober?
And here I stop to gaze at the Cornfield that was recently trampled. What a metaphor for the fate of the Cornhuskers.


Eh, they'll live to play another day. Just like us! Who could be sad on Randay?


P.S. Thanks to Suki Sumo who posted about HER foodables to cheer me up! Thanks my puggy friend!