Saturday, September 25, 2010

Ethel Jean Reports on the Big Doings

There are many exciting things afoot here! I will fill you in as Mr. Super Teen is a bit embarrassed about his most recent exploits. You see, Oscar Bean, Super Teen is GOING TO SCHOOL. Or, er, was. He is a two-time dropout from obedience class. He gets too anxious on leash around new people and dogs and was, in the words of our ma ape, Oscar Beasticle, Drama Queen (that doesn't rhyme any more, ee cummings.) So now he has to go to PRIVATE SCHOOL before he can go back to PUBLIC SCHOOL with the other dogs and peoples. But he is super good in the Rondo, see? That is good because on the way back from school...

BANG! Someone rear-ended the ma ape! And OBST had to sit in the car for like 45 minutes and the K-9 unit showed up and barked at him and not a peep! What a little Angel.

OK, now I will let Otis talk about his adventures at the VET!

Look at me! Bully boy in the Rondo! Going for a ride, quality time with the ma ape, right?

WRONG! I had company. And I should give you some alarming news. I am a dangerously thin 75 pounds, down from over 85 pounds in April. AND. Baby had to go back to the v-e-t because (whisper: his poo showed giardias last times! He was a parasite inside and out!) Also alarming:

Their decor needs some work.

We were totally the belles of the ball at the v-e-t's office, especially after I nearly knocked over a vet tech with my gigantic head, supersized so as to accommodate my obviously ginormous brain. It made both vets double over with laughter. In exchange for my comedic services I requested they do a chutzpah-ectomy on the little dude.

I am sorry to report that the surgery was not successful.

BACK TO ETHEL! I would like to remind you that I am not responsible for any of the MAYHEM AND FOOLISHNESS described in this post and I have been a perfectly well behaved young lady.
With slightly crazy eyes.

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Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Wordless Wednesday (or, MMMMMMPPPH)

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Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Three Generations of Corgitude

You may not know that while the ma ape enjoys a coterie of canines in a variety of sizes and shapes she is a long time corgador fancier. Before she had me, Edgrr the half corgador, she had Wally THE corgador, and before that Conan the half corgador. Let's take a look, shall we?

This is Conan the Corgbarian, our ma ape's first dog. Our GranNE was most kind to scan pho-tos of him for our ma ape to show off. Our ma ape's GranNE and Gramps were also most kind to get our ma ape a corgi after she researched breeds and picked out the corgi. He is our ape's only dog purchased from a breeder, a lovely lady who showed corgis (including Conan's dad who was a pageant boy) and competing in herding (Conan was more involved in Human Resources.)

Our ma ape jokes that Conan was GranNE and Gramps' favorite child as he was the most good-looking and by far the most intelligent. (Don't tell her that it's not a joke.) He was known for his love of havarti and braunschweiger, his excellent work managing the human herd, and his most adorable of faces.

You know this guy! WALLY! He started this blog and was kind enough to bequeath it to his bratty sheppy siblings. He is ma ape's only purebred corgador (thus far). He was from a rescue in Snoqualmie, Washington. West Coast boy! Wally IS the breed standard for the corgador, requiring a big kissable head, adorbs stumpy legs, expressive face

And roaching mastery!

And now I join this illustrious line of short-legged, bossy, nosy, food-loving, naked ape manipulating, spoiled bestiary! I'll make you proud, Grandpas Conan and Wally!

Now, you should ask your apes to leave the room while I share a secret with you. You should be alerted to the reality that half-corgadors are TAKING OVER THE WORLD. Oh yes, we are remaking the world.

In our image.

Viva La Revolucion!

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Monday, September 20, 2010

I am mangOtis!

I am Spartacus Mango!

I was most excited when I read about the Be Like Mango contest! You see, when I first got on the series of tubes to meet all of Wally's friends I was most intrigued by the Mango Man who is possessed of a most fetching brindle coat, a fashionable black mask, and jowls that go on forever. We even both have most annoying black-coated siblings (hey, not everyone can wear stripes). Indeed, I sometimes like to fancy myself a mini-Mango. (Mini is relative as I am quite substantial myself.)

I have a most impressive tongue that can produce slobber with the best of them:

And I can produce ice-cream aided suds.

As with Mango I require much sustenance throughout the day to keep my most muscular body going. My prodigious eating capacity also makes me the world's 3rd largest source of natural gas.

We also have most expressive faces able to covey a variety of messages.

Righteously indignant.

Ironic distance.

Hunger (for meaning and for food.)

I just ate 3 pounds of dirt.

Like Mango I am a prolific gardener who prunes the hostas daily.

And I am a Sophisticated Gentleman who never likes to go out without a little lipstick.

We are both unparalleled athletes who require regular exercise for our physicals and our mentals.

And then there is my Mango-ness. I got tutored so late that I can fake possession of my original mangoes. I am quite hopeful for the wonderful prize that it be either a nice container of suds with which to wash my brindley furs or perhaps some fruitables:

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Sunday, September 19, 2010

Our Mango-ness!

We interrupt our regularly scheduled post (Huskers beat Huskies 56-21!! Ha-ROOOOOO!) to bring you this entry in the Be! Like! Mango! contest! Otis has asked to make a separate entry and so this will be the pointy dogs do Mango!

Ethel is first. Go Ethel!

I am not going to SHOUT LIKE ETHEL I am instead going to be calm, assertive and most masterful with the English languages like Mango Man. I am most like Mango in my dedication to meditations. I like to sit by myself and contemplate the universe.

If you look carefully you will see me sitting in the shade under the tree like a wise (and skinny) Buddha contemplating the universe. Like Mango, I work very hard on my mentals. I am not often in the pho-tos of shenanigans because I like to meditate by myself or sit at the top of the hill to survey my estate.

Oscar's turn!

I also like to do the meditations as you can see from my look of dedicated concentrations.

You can always tell from my face how much I am focusing on the thinkerating. Now, youngins avert your eyes.

Also, here is my Mango-ness. Your turn, Edgrrrr!

My first resemblance is, of course, in my being RELENTLESSLY HUGE! Everyone knows that corgis are the largest dogs in the universe. How else could I rule this house with an iron paw were I not RH?

There is also the matter of my a-maz-ing athleticism. And, like Mango, I have a complicated relationship with stairs. I used to not be able to do them. Then I could go up but not down. And now I am the STAIR MASTER. Such are the wages of being a relentlessly huge dog.

And then, of course, there is my mango-ness.

Thank you, Mango, for this opportunity to show how we are the most Mango of all the dogs. Otis says that he will have a post that will blow everyone out of the water, even Mango's brudder Dexter Labradude who might be part fish. He would tell you this himself but he is too busy snoring.

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