Friday, November 10, 2006

dogue for adoption

awwww, look at hooch, with a face only a wally could love. adopt him! (he's in oregon, lucky dog.)

what i do best

the camera doesn't lie.

i think rick's son speaks for all of us here.

and, while i tend to revel in the pain of naked apes (schadenfreude and all that), i have to say, if your children are so devastated they can't keep it together? leave 'em backstage with the grandparents. don't place them in the crosshairs of your jerkdom.

election hangover

here i am after post-election celebration.

the day after the election we had to get up to go for a walk at 5 a.m. IN THE RAIN. i think that violates the geneva convention (not that we recognize those any more). look at wet wally!

i had to have a little morning pick-me-up as you can see. hair of the dog.

turnabout is fair play!

hi! ethel again. my brother wally has been posting unflattering photos of me sleeping so i'll do the same to him! i give you, wally in repose.

i think he's not going to let me be speaker any more. tee hee.

Thursday, November 09, 2006

let the ladies speak!

this is my sister, speaker of our house ethel. she's one tough dog.

this is speaker of the house nancy pelosi, not my sister ethel.

one of the many benefits of a democratic victory is that we are about to have our first lady speaker of the house. i'm a big fan of ladies, my mawma happens to be one, and it's about time we let them speak. in honor of madam speaker pelosi, i hand this blog over to one of the greatest ladies in my life, my sister ethel:

hi! i'm ethel and as speaker of this house (for one blog) and the temporary ruler of the majority party (actually there are two dogs and two naked apes but our mawma often acts in a bispecies fashion) i pledge to let no squirrel go unchased, to aid and abet my brother by using my longer legs to help him countersurf, to end the corruption of the naked apes who constantly bogart the good food and never share enough, i will bark at robbie the neighborpoodle, to chew every squeaky toy until it squeaks no more, to engage in constant pre-emptive strikes against dogs who look at my brother funny, and to engage in constant pre-emptive love strikes on all naked apes, smothering them with my weapons of mass smoochification before they can get me, i will run faster than any other dog at the park, and i will continue to eat my dinner verrrrrry slowly to drive my brother crazy. also i will make my fellow ladies proud by continuing to kick butt.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

better this red than theirs!

congratulations to bernie sanders, america's first socialist senator, who ran virtually uncontested because he is vermont's most beloved politician (even more than dr. dean. who sends me an awful lot of e-mail). he captured 65% of the vote--almost as impressive as santorum's loss was pathetic.

how does a self-identified socialist (Congress calls him an independent) manage to win in this god-fearin', red-baitin' country? well, by putting the demos back in the democracy. my goodness what is he doing actually talking and listening to people about issues! this must stop. from the nation:

Sanders keeps issues of economics and corporate power on the table by using his Congressional franking privileges to send out newsletters that, rather than featuring self-serving photos and pronouncements, offer easily accessible tutorials on the damage done to workers, farmers and the environment by free-trade policies, the threat to democracy posed by media consolidation and the workings of a single-payer healthcare system. Every year, Sanders holds single-issue town hall meetings in some of the smallest communities in the state, where he brings in experts on poverty, healthcare reform and other issues for discussions that can run deep into the evening. The crowds are big, often packing the halls. People get to complain. But they also get something else--an alternative view on how the economy of the country and the world might be organized to favor their interests. This long-term, intensive education process is the closest thing to the "secret" of Sanders's success. Vermonters associate their Congressman with serious discussions about complicated issues, and they understand where he's coming from--and that allows Sanders to go places most politicians fear to tread.

on a side note, bernie would be a great name for a basset hound. and i would totally vote for a basset hound, too. go bernies!

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

who let the dogs out?

this picture is on the front page of the new york times online addition. is this dog voting? power to the dogs! there IS hope...

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waiting for returns

my sister and i are sitting around waiting for the election returns to roll in. let me just say i was nothing short of irate to find that i couldn't vote. as many of you may remember, last summer i won my canine good citizen certificate and yet, even though i showed up at the polling station with my certificate i didn't get to vote. WHAT? i don't mangle jokes, engage in pre-emptive strikes, poop in the house (that's for you, goddamn cats), or enviscerate the constitution. and yet you don't trust ME--a GOOD citizen--to vote.

here i am contemplating america's future. or a crumb of food that may or may not be trapped in the carpet.

my sister ethel finds more active ways to spend her time. here she is playing 'West Coast Offense' or 'Cornhusker football, the losing years.' Her favorite player Marlon Lucky not only caught a TD pass last weekend but threw one! awesome. her distraction technique has worked. i haven't thought about dirty tricks in the election in several minutes!

here my sister runs stairs with her squeaky football. that's how she keeps her svelte figure. but you can see the worry in her eyes. is she thinking about rebuilding america's middle east policy or is she just hypnotized by the squeaker in her ball?

here i am gnawing on the deceased remnants of one-party rule. democracy tastes so sweet.

if i close my eyes i can almost taste rick santorum's defeat. mmmmmm.

breaking news

dear dog. i don't know how we can be holding an election when the following breaking news was just announced--

britney spears is divorcing kevin federline.

this changes everything.

Monday, November 06, 2006

give me a home where the ephalants roam!

the philly zoo is giving away its ephalants! sadly, although i promised to take them with me on my daily walk and to the b-a-r-k-p-a-r-k on weekends, i am not one of the recipients. after a fight between the asian ephalant and african ephalants (i guess elephants are nationalist?) last year they got a lot of grief from picketers. so they're giving them to another zoo and a sanctuary where they will have more room to roam and fume over having been appropriated by the gop (and the alabama football team. how the hell is an elephant a "crimson tide)? enjoy your new homes, guys!