welfare queen spotted in pa

thanks to michael berube for blogging about everyone's favorite senator, rick santorum. my pal rick has called for folks who stayed in new orleans to be fined or charged with a crime:

I mean, you have people who don't heed those warnings and then put people at risk as a result of not heeding those warnings. There may be a need to look at tougher penalties on those who decide to ride it out and understand that there are consequences to not leaving.

he, at the same time, is collecting $38,000/year (thus far totaling more than $100,000) from the state of Pennsylvania to send his kids to charter school so he can live in d.c. without paying the private school tuition himself.

this quote makes me quite proud to be an animal and not a santorum:

My colleague Senator John Ensign of Nevada told me a story that epitomizes the selfishness of our culture: When I was a teenager, I had a sticker in my car with a picture of a bear scratching himself on the tree, and under it was the saying, If it feels good, do it!
That was the motto of the '60s and the '70s, and certainly it is the motto today. The image of the bear scratching himself highlights a view of human beings as animals, and that people should do what pleases them at the moment without a thought to the broader long-term consequences of their actions. Rick Santorum, Heritage Foundation Lecture #804

glad you're up for election in 2006, rick. we can speak our minds, too. it feels good, do it.

another sad story

try and read this story about a boy and his dog (and a hurricane) without crying. seriously, i'm going to get so many belly rubs and snacks out of my mawma after she reads this.

my sister's dark secret

i've been wondering if dick cheney (who kicks puppies by the way) was still alive since we haven't heard much from him of late and since the vp's job is attending state funerals and occasionally glad-handing the public when the president's too busy to visit the hoi polloi, he's been conspicuously absent from the photos of bush surrounded by white guys in mississippi and louisiana.

it turns out that cheney has had some important shopping to do--real estate in maryland. he is moving in near his bud rummy who also owns an impressive estate along the coast. cheney bought shotgun shells while there, probably to shoot puppies and hurricane victims.

the disturbing part? my little sister ethel comes from the eastern shore. though she was a stray which is probably a count in her favor; being rejected by those folks is a sure sign you've got something going on. listen to this:

Residents joke about the occasional helicopter overhead and what flavor Rumsfeld gets at Justine's Ice Cream parlor. One woman even drew a clear distinction -- pro-Rumsfeld, anti-Cheney.

"Cheney's a politician. He's connected with Bush," said Rhonda Lewis, 58, a bookkeeper at a bike shop in nearby Easton. She has always had a crush on Rumsfeld. "He is just adorable."
She thinks the defense secretary often looks stressed out on TV, and seeing him walk casually through St. Michaels in khakis is comforting. "Bush just dumped all the hard stuff on him," Lewis said.

i'm so glad we rescued my Ethel from this dark, dark place.