Wally, in verse

My friend Gus wrote a song about the Good King Wally!

Thanks, bud. My ma ape was touched. I mean, we all know she's a bit touched in the head but this time she was touched in the heart.

SPCA Saturday--The DRRRRRRRRTY Edition!

Two days of SPCA Saturday? Oh yes! And this is Drrrrrrrrrrrrr-ick with the Drrrrrrrr-ty edition! Why is it dirty? Oh you shall see! (Children avert your eyes-haha!) I'm Drrrrrrr-ick and wouldn't it be great if there were two Saturdays in the week like maybe instead of Tuesday and it was Monday night and then BAM! It's Saturday again! And more Drrrrrrrr-ick!


Ok, here's our dirty dogs! It's Dexterrrrr and Billie Jean! And boy do they like to play! And boy was it muddy! And the camera did not capture it but they got FILTHYDRRRTY!

They ran ran ran in the mudddd.

Until the only thing white on them was their teetherrrrrs!


Whew! These puppers wear me OUT. And they got even drrr-tier in the SPCA lobby when Dexter decided that Billie Jean WAS his lover. She is a girl and he thinks she is the one! Dude is too young for those kinda shenanigans! And he has no business wearing white, I tell ya. Those dudes had to take BATHS.


And also someone brought in a litter of pups! Wee ones!


This one is a chunky monkey!


Oh look at handsome Drrrrr-ick! The lady said I look like Big Red Jr. so that's my name, don't wear it out!


Go Big RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRed!

SPCA....Friday???!!!?!!?!

Oh Yes! It's the day after Christmas, better known in Britain and its former colonies as BOXER DAY! It is a day for giving to the less fortunate and for worshiping BOXERS. So meet ME, Forman! Boxer Extraordinaire! When I came into the SPCA I was so skinny my legs were just bone and skin and I could barely stand up. And now I am the MOST COOL DUDE on the planet! Meet my buds!

First, there was a HORSE at the SPCA! Whoa! That's a big lady!

This pretty lady got adopted right after getting her picture stuck. She got adopted on the best day--BOXER DAY!


This is lady Bella and she is still at the SPCA because she had some kennel cough and she's totally shy and she PEEEEEEEED on the lady when she picked her up! Haha! Honorary Boxer!

And this lady is BILLIE JEAN (P.S. She is not my lov-er.) She is very good at tennis. HAHA. Kidding. She is really really nice. She's prob a pit/sheppy mix or something. And she ROCKS. Honorary Boxer!

This is Priscilla! She is one wild and crazy blond! She likes zoomies, especially when you try to put her on leash. Honorary Boxer!

This is Rikki! She is, um, HONORARY BOXER! She likes to play and to stand on the lady.


Look! Flying boxer!

Look! Bug eyes! What a wonderful BOXER DAY!


We're the new guys at the SPCA! Come get us, k!

Wally had a Little Lamb!

My ma ape said I should not brag about all my giftables in ONE POST because it looks DECADENT! So I will give you just a bit at a time, starting with the best bit! Look at the star leading the wise men to bring gifts to a special wee lad! (Or it is the sun. Wevs. We all know time around here is divided into B.W. and LHMBOW--before Wally and Life Has Meaning Because of Wally)

My ma ape wanted to get me something special for my meatable eatables and so she got me a LAMB BUTT:

My brudder usually eats in his crate so as soon as he saw the BUTT he went and ran in his crate ready for action:


My ma ape had to chop it up and we had a big pile of the meatables!

We not only got special lambuttables but we got fed by hand:

Lambutt for peppy sheppys.

Lambutt for the Wally!


My ma ape even sustained injuries! And, just for the record, WE did not inflict the wound. The ma ape had a hard time getting the meats off the bones and we nearly had raw meaty ma ape!

Here's the ape food. The other ape had ham-ables and the ma ape had wheat "meatables" and then they had root vegetables with balsamic/maple glaze and some cherry/walnut stuffing and pumpkin bisque soups. I think our din dins were better. Most def bloodier!


Merry Christmas, buds! I hope you all had a holiday as wonderful as a pile of butt!

Santa Claus will not be coming to town

Some reindeer landed in our yard. This is what is left.


I got Dancer and Prancer. Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha! I will have to tell you about our super special Christmas gift. The pictures are lousy because we have not seen the sun here for awhile. No snow, though.


And now I'm going to share with you my FAVORITE Christmas tune. It's the Pogues! With my teeth twin, Shane MacGowan.

E-bo-ny and I-vo-ry!

It's time for OCCASIONAL OSCAR! Wally has been hoggin' the bloggin' cuz of his bum ticker! So I said that I wanna go play and then I want to tell everyone about it, k! It was SO COLD so I had to be FAST.

So here I am with an Aussie girl and she liked to shout at me! Why are girls always shouting at me and chasing me like my sissy???!?! Maybe I should not bite them in the bums!

See us doin' the chase game!

And that other girl liked to shout at me so when my friend Kasey came I shouted at her! But she didn't like it. So then we played rasslin'! If you look you can see my back is all slobbery from Kasey.

I like to be on the bottom!

And then guess who showed up??? My bud Ricky! He was adopterated out with his sissy Ilsa but then he had to come back but now he has a NEW home that he's going to on Wednesday! I think Santa is taking him. Rickyyyyyyyyy!


Here's Ricky's brudder Tuchuck.

But me n' Ricky are Ebony and Ivory! Two Teen Terrors! Chasey!

Mouthy!
Bitey.
Handsomey!

Humpy!

And Randi was missin' Wally so here he is looking especially WEIRD. I think he just got probed by aliens. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

The ladies don't SHOUT at Wally and he says it is because he does not bite them on the butts. Wevs! Later, dudes! Oscar out!

SPCA Sat-brrrrrrrrrrrrr-day!

Hey! It is cold but NOT too cold for SPCA Saturday with DEXTER! Not Mango's Dexter but ME, Delaware Dexter!

OK first is the greaterest news EVER (other than the news that YOU could have DEXTER!) is that CODY, the longest term resident at the SPCA has gone to a home! Ha-rooooooooo! Cody has been there since May and while he is like totes handsome and totes sweet with peeps he is NOOOOOOT good with other dog dudes. But now he has his own home! Way to go Cody and Cody's new peeps!


Now for those of us still waiting for homes. OK, I'm going to get the puppy out of the way because I'm the other puppy and I am totes jealous of people cooing over her puppy cuteness. I AM A CUTE PUPPY TOO!. This is Bella. Yeah, yeah, she's cute and probably about 3 months old.



OK and this is Zeus who is TOTALLY handsome even though the photographer did a lousy job capturing his handsomeness. He's too sexy for this camera! He's an American bulldog and this pic does not quite capture the fact that he is BIIIIG. Like his head is the same size as ME.


This dooood is Scoob, oka Scooby, and he likes snacks. Teehee! He's prob a purebred spaniel but he looks like he has a wee eye problem (too many scooby snacks?). ADOPT HIM ALREADY and get him to a vet, ok?


And this boxer? American bulldog? mix is Chops! He's very shy and scared but has lovely red patches on his back and likes peoples.

And this is Angel who is very very scared and sad. Someone butchered her ears and she had some sores on her. She tucks her tail between her legs but she will warm up to peoples if they treat her nice and gently. She is a pit mix who will need a special someone to take her in and show her that not quite all apes are JERKAZOIDS.

And this is Bethenny the good time gal! She loves to play and is totes friendly!


And THIS wee lad is Mad Sam! He's a total beagle who loves to RUN and CHASE and SMELL STUFF.
Whoever gets him will need plenty of time and energy to help him work his ya-yas out. The ape who visited ME was mad about him.


Speaking of Mad About Pups, here I am, DE Dexter! I am a totally cute guy and they have me listed as a shepherd which, um, is unlikely given my size (I look like a miniature sheppy!) I'm just a pup and I love zoomies and kisses and especially standing on my hind legs on ape bellies and getting snacks!


After the holidays when all the annoying relatives have gone and it's nothing but you and the stale fruitcake isn't that just the time to BRING ONE OF US HOME?