Friday, May 29, 2009

A Milestone.

This is a contemplative corgador.

Why, you ask, does he think so deep? Because this is his 1,506th post. And what is so special about 1,506? Why it is special because his 1,500th post passed by before anyone had noticed!

And so here are some of the many things that have happened since I began blogging, lo some five years ago.

I got a new sissy Ethel and a new brudder Oscar and I stole tenny balls from them.

I got spondylosis, a heart problem, switched to a raw diet and ate many a bone.

I met many many canine buds and roached for joy.

Happy 1,506!

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Thursday, May 28, 2009

All About Waylon

Hiyeeee! Welcome to the first and only blog by Waylon "Rat Boy" Pit Boo Puppy!

Wally didn't like me and I made his face do this! (See his eyebrows? Those are nervousboy eyebrows!)

I don't know why just cuz I did bitey bitey bitey cheeks! But Wally said I could blog about my BIG WEEKEND at his house which was TOTALLY FUNLIKE! Ok first here is part of my fam.

I had one brudder an four sissies all born at the SPCA! Here's me n' my brudder playin'.

Nomnom puppy playtime! I am on the bottom here.


Then I went to a new house and I am so brave that I like to explore everything.

And I like to put everything in my mouth! Here I am with a piece of ce-ment in my mouth.

And here I am eating a tree.

And I had two different kinds of favorite toys. I liked the toys that Wally's friends The Brat Pack sent. See?

And even though they got me lots and lots of expensive puppy toys my other favorite toy was PLASTIC BOTTLES! NOMNOM.


And then here's my other favorite toy OSCAR BEAN. He followed me everywhere and he loved to put me in his mouth and it was SO FUN.

The lady said I had MOXIE but I thought I got shots for that.


One of my OTHER favorite things to do was HUMP and here are some things that I humped: the naked apes, Ethel's legs, Oscar's legs, Oscar's butt, Oscar's tail, Wally's tail, feet, Wall-E, every stuffy I came in contact with, a pile of dirty clothes. You get the picture. Here I am checking out where I was GLUED SHUT after my neutering. I wanted to make sure nothin' bad happened after a particularly vigorous morning with Wall-E.



Here I am distracting the ma ape by blowing raspberries at the ma ape while I get ready to do a sneak attack on her foot. Should I nibble the toes or hump it? MAYBE BOTH!

Here I am in JAIL even though I only had ONE ACCIDENT because I put everything in my mouth and COULD NOT BE TRUSTED. Whatever. I have a plastic bottle and a stuffy.

But I am SO MAD I have to be in jail even though I have toys. I want the OscarToy on the outside!

At the new house I ate many tasty things like frozen applesauce, chicken necks, lambs, chicken livers, and frosty paws!

I like it!

More raspberries. Just cuz.

I am going to miss my best bud OscarToy. He gave me regular baths in his mouth.

But I am moving on to new exciting adventures!
Nice to hump know ya!

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Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Visiting Hours Cancelled

Alas, my buds Sophie n' Stan could not make it from NYC to Dela-where. I think they were forced to reconsider when they realized what stood in the way: New Jersey! (Just kidding, Joisey folks!) So I have created this photo essay to illustrate for them what they will be missing:





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Shhhh...it's Oscar BS Teen!

Guys, guys! IT'S OSCAR BEAN SUPER TEEN Shhhh...I'm trying not to let the secret out but I found the coolest thing in my house and I think it was my burpday present for my TERRIBLE TWOS! It was like a squeaky that MOVED! And squeaked! And pooped!

And kissed me!
But then I lost it. Oh I'm in such big trouble!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SHHHHHH!

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Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Update on the Little Guy

So, you are probably wondering what came of the (in Mango's words) little rat named Waylon Pit Boo that wandered into my house. Well, we took a vote and it came out as follows:

In favor of keeping Waylon Rat Boy: 2 Naked Apes, Ethel, Oscar, Waylon
Against: Wally

I won.

He brought out Oscar's playful side and Ethel's mothering side and in spite of the fact that he woke her up every hour at night and kept her occupied most hours of the day, the Ma Ape was in love: (Note--below picture is Ethel, not the Ma Ape who has short legs and looks much more like me than my leggy sibs):

He did NOT bring out the best in me:

The little guy bothered me. I wasn't aggressive I was just...aggressively sad. My ma ape could tell that I was very, very upset and it was taking a toll on my ticker. I hid from him, I pinned my ears back, I wouldn't play and worst of all I had an elevated heart rate and I didn't want to be anywhere around Waylon. So Waylon is finding a new home so that I can retire in peace. As a concession I have promised to let Waylon do one blog post to tell you about his Big Adventure at our house. So more on him later when my ma ape gets less leaky about the whole situation (though she would like to send thanks to the consulting firm she hired to discuss the matter--Mango Momma's Sage Words. We knew she had great judgment (in spite of the whole Labradude situation) because she picked out Mango). It was the right thing to do. Today I was happy to get back to my regular routine of napping, eating, monkey sticking, and humping my Oscar Brudder. Waylon will make someone else very, very happy.

In other important matters I AM HAVING VISITORS! Stan and Sophie coming to Delaware! I'm so nervous I've been trying to pick out outfits. Since they are important guests I think I should wear a suit.

Link
I'm thinking my birthday suit. Any other suggestions?

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