Wally's No Good Weekend

I had a terrible weekend, thanks for asking. I'll recap it. First, we had snow. But it was not enough to eat or play in, just enough to make it muddy enough so I have to get my undercarriage wiped when I come in.

And then in spite of the weather my ape went to the SPCA and these gross things were there.


And she thought it was ok to cheat on me with wee ickle puppies.


And then there were assorted failed attempts to get a Holiday Card photo.

The pictures did capture something of our spirit.


Some of us were humiliated.

Others of us maintained our dignity.


And then the worst EVER! Nebraska lost to Tex-ass by a mere 13-12 with a last minute field goal! Last weekend my Saskatchewan Roughriders lost after a last minute field goal! I curse the uprights!


Here is my sissy watching the last second of the game:


And here is my sissy showing what she would do if she ran into a Longhorn (or one of those lousy refs)


I'm going to sleep through Monday and hope that Tuesday will bring better stuff.

Wally's! Wild! Weekend!

One of my apes was out of town this weekend which means we got to cut loose and have some FUN! Like my ma ape's favorite wild and crazy weekend fun--going to bed early! I also played "America's Next Top Wally."

I won.

I played with my sissy. Hey sissy! Put your tongue away!


I have to herd her so she knows what to do.

And I have to give her pointers on the fetching.

Hey! Wait for me!

For fun, pretend that I am running across the field for a warm embrace.


closer.
Closer!

Pucker up, I'm here!

The pictures are kinda fuzzy because it was BRIGHT out. And also, I guess it is hard to operate a Chuckit AND a camera. And poop bags.


My sissy practiced some levitating.

Been caught roachin'!


A close-up of my lovely mug!

Weekend Plans

Everyone wanted to know what my big weekend plans were. While they're not as big as Suki's secret new brotherable but still, busy for me. Here are my plans.

1. ROACHIN!


2. BASEBALL! Surprising, I know! I had thought baseball was over because a) my teams were in freefall (and I root for three--Moaners, Cubbies, and Phillies) but suddenly the Cubs are IN the playoffs, and the Phillies are making a run! Oh, and b) I find baseball kind of boring to watch. But here I am in my Phillies bananadanana. And I'm telling the Mets how I feel about 'em.


3. PLAYING! Here I am showing the Phillies how to catch a ball. Maybe not the best technique with a baseball if you want to keep your teeths.


4. LAUGHIN'! Here I am enjoying a good dirty joke my sissy told me. I can't repeat it. There are youngins like Suki Sumo and Mitch and Sparky's new brother reading.




5. WALKIN'! We went on a wee walkabout.


I posed in front of the sunflowerables.



6. And SNACKABLES! I'm using my bananadana as a bib while I eat my boneable.


7. SNAPPING! (Ie, napping.)


The Cornhuskers are not on the telly this week so no one is yelling at the teevee so I can catch 40 winks. Until tonight because the Washington Huskies are playing USC and that's my alma mater (UW, that is). They gave me a PhDog. My ma ape says I should not lie about my academic credentials but what does she know what I was up to while she was in class?

The storm before the calm

Warning--this is a sissy heavy post. You might turn green reading this one, too.

Yesterday the apes decided to try to wear us out before they left so we wouldn't behave like WILD ANIMALS while they were gone. This generally means letting me meander around while throwing the tennis ball to my sissy so she makes funny faces.

Like this one:


Here she is practicing walking on two legs.


When the tongue starts flapping you know she's getting tired.


Beware the teeth.


How does she avoid biting off her floppy tongue with those nasty teeth?


And she continued to embarrass me with her tenuous control over her own mouth.


Flip.


Flop.


And then this happened. I decided I wanted to play tennis ball even though I could care less about tennis balls or fetching. Sometimes a boy just wants a ball, ok?

So if you look the ball has been thrown to me and is bouncing just above my head. Sissy does not watch where she is going and...


BIFF!

My sissy heard a mouthful from me. And look who got the tennis ball!


All's well that end with Wally getting what he wants.


Ahhhhhhhhhh!

Dog Days

Since my sissy and I nearly caught a deer last weekend we have had to stick to leashed walks and other BO-RING things. So I've found ways to amuse myself.

Here I am "roaching" as the lurchers call it.


And I play tug with my big ass.


His ears are perfect for pulling. I would show you a video with audio but my growling has been known to terrorize even the bravest of dogs.


I also played with the froggy. I gave him a buttectomy just like pastel hedgie! I tore holes in their bums and surgically removed their squeakies. I mean, SOMEBODY must have done that. If you didn't see me do it you have no proof. (Shut up sissy!)


And I rampaged around the house. Look how fast I am--the camera can barely capture me!