Wally's No Good Weekend

I had a terrible weekend, thanks for asking. I'll recap it. First, we had snow. But it was not enough to eat or play in, just enough to make it muddy enough so I have to get my undercarriage wiped when I come in.

And then in spite of the weather my ape went to the SPCA and these gross things were there.


And she thought it was ok to cheat on me with wee ickle puppies.


And then there were assorted failed attempts to get a Holiday Card photo.

The pictures did capture something of our spirit.


Some of us were humiliated.

Others of us maintained our dignity.


And then the worst EVER! Nebraska lost to Tex-ass by a mere 13-12 with a last minute field goal! Last weekend my Saskatchewan Roughriders lost after a last minute field goal! I curse the uprights!


Here is my sissy watching the last second of the game:


And here is my sissy showing what she would do if she ran into a Longhorn (or one of those lousy refs)


I'm going to sleep through Monday and hope that Tuesday will bring better stuff.

Message for my Ma Ape

Dear Ma Ape,

Yeah, I'm using the computer without you. I told you I have opposable thumbs. That's how I open the cabinets when you're gone. And send text messages to my lady Samantha full of smooches. And opened that flat of cans of tripe.


We need to have a talk. You've been back since 8 a.m. on Monday and you have helped me blog ONCE. This is unacceptable. I know you say you have important things to do like catching up on sleep or teaching your classes but you need to get your priorities straight.


Priority #1:

A distant third: everything else.

Get it sorted ma ape. I could have you replaced.

I Forgive Joe!

OK, I decided that I can't be mad at Joe Stains anymore even though he made fun of where I live because he posted a video where he pees on his brother and it made me laugh so much I forgot why I was mad. Also I have a short attention span. Except with anything involving food. I am impatient, but I keep my eye on the prize. What was I saying? Oh right, Joe and The Pits-burgh.

And also the Dogs of Jackman Ave live in Spittsburgh and Sherman and I are practically the same dog so of course he's awesome!

My girl Sophie asked for a cartoon picture of me and here you go! I will have to do another one with me in the beer helmet, too. I need a beer helmet! I'll share it with you Joe! But we probably shouldn't watch a Yankees game cuz then we might fight again.

And I was going to make a joke that we can all be friends--we can all make fun of New Jersey! But then Ruby's mum is from there. And Nanook and Pooka live there. I'll just have to pick on my sissy. Safe target (don't hurt me Max n' Pippa!).