St. Wally's Feast!

Today is Boxing Day and also St. Stephen's Feast and my good pal Gus has written me a wonderful tune to celebrate the day on which we are to give prezzies to the less fortunate. You can find the lyrics on his blog and sing along as you look at these pictures of me enjoying my pawliday.

On Christmas Eve my Auntie Claus arrived from Sweden the North Pole and brought good cheer and prezzies for all. I felt good enough to eat a chew with both of my teeth!

And I got a new buffalo that I can wear as a snazzy faux fur coat.

Or vanquish with great relish.

And because I have been extra special good I got ANOTHER lamb leg!

Which my ma ape did butcher with great skill and flourish (and a little bit of gagging). WARNING: GRAPHIC MEATY PHOTO! And yes, that is a bloody band-aid from where she did nearly butcher a bit of her hand.







It has been much fun and also much work to keep track of my pack so I am in great need of a nap here on my nest of a monkey stick, my ma ape's coat that I pulled off the couch, and a Best Friends bag from my besties in the Brat Pack. Ahhhhh.

I hope everyone remembers the less fortunate today. My ape has purchased some bags of supplies to give to the dogs at the SPCA in honor of Gus and his mad songwriting skills. May all dogs follow in my footsteps to find wonderful new homes:

Therefore, all ye dogs, be sure,
Wealth or rank possessing,
Ye who now will bless the poor,
Shall yourselves find blessing.

Waiting for Godot. No, Santa.

We are waiting for my Auntie Ira's plane to arrive so we can pick her up. I am hoping Santa is on her flight so we can cut to the chase and open our prezzies. I am very lucky this year that I have something BETTER than Santa--my girlfriends! First, my lady Randi sent me a Get Well card to help heal my ticker.

I feel better already! And then I got a WHOLE BOX of stuff from my lady Samantha. Including a red sock monkey! I have to keep my eyes on my Onkel Eric because he has been threatening to steal it. And look! A Green Wiener! And a Red Wiener! And a Bovine Stick! So much fun.

And now I need to have a little chat with Santa. Some of us have been extra good this year putting up with their obnoxious matching set of siblings:

And some of us have even been willing to snuggle with their bratty younger brudders so they are not afraid of the dark:


But don't let the sheppys apparent feigned sweetness fool you. They have been extra wild this year.

And others a bit, um, shameless:


So I'll be waiting for their coal and my wonderful prezzies, though I won't stay up too late because no matter what you bring it couldn't possibly top my wonderful friends and girlfriends!


P.S. Thank you so much Randi and Brat Pack!

Naughty and Nice

As it is the holiday season I have been making my list and checking it twice and I have been picking out some things that I want. First, the snow has reminded me how hard it is for me to keep up with peppy sheppys.


Their long legs give them a definite advantage in the snow.

So I believe I would like one of these contraptions. No, not a cat. A roomba and then I could ride around and boss them about.



Next, my Auntie Ira is coming to visit me from Sweden! I cannot wait for the meatballs and lingonberries!

And some herrings, please!



And for all my girlfriends and bromances I got you this--a steamy corgador in a snowbank:


And now I'm off to get some coal to put in the sheppy stockings!

After the Storm!

We have 99999999999999999999 million photos in the snow! It was a HORRIBLE storm but we were brave enough to weather it! (Inside with filet mignon.)

Look at me! Fighting the storm!

And SOMEONE thought it was funny to show how I had to clear out an area to do my business.

The sheppys were driven mad!

Tearing around like mad crackerdogs.

The gnashing of teeth!

And more gnashing.

More.


And then the zoomies.

Fur and snow flying.


Woooooosh!


You can see that I am untouched by the madness.


Snow smoochies.

And another, please.

And now let's dig into our steaks, plz.

A Visitor from the North!

My Onkel Eric has come to visit me all the way from Norway! And he brought a very special present that I must show you!

Can you see how ho-hum humdrum things were the day he was to arrive.

Same old, same old regular obnoxious peppy sheppys.

I was wondering--would I remember my Onkel who I have not seen in over six years? (Answer: yes.)

And what presents might he bring me? I was hoping for smalahove, a Norwegian dish often served at Christmastime made of a sheep's head.


Or maybe a reindeer who could pull me around before I ate him?

Alas, he could not get either of these things through customs but he did bring us something really really wonderful...

Snow!! Piles and piles of it! For me to eat!


Still obnoxious sheppys but no more same old same old!


No more humdrum ho hum!

Look at the sheppys unable to keep up with me!


Hooray! And everyone is trapped in the house admiring ME! Feeding ME snacks!


Thanks for the prezzie Onkel Eric!

A Grab Bag of Good Times

Things have been very sad around here lately so I thought I would take this opportunity to wish Sophie's ape a happy happy birthday and share with you some of the many things that happened that were not sad.

First, my ape has become obsessed with photographically documenting my every cute moment which is every moment which means I do not get a moment's rest from the puparazzi.

I can sort of understand, though, as this is a devastatingly handsome face. I'm sure this is how Angelina Jolie feels. It's not easy being beautiful.


A boy cannot even get a belly rub in peace! (Look at my pawesome corgi ears, though!)

Now things that happened other than the relentless pursuit of the puparazzi. I got a package in the mail!

Pawsonalized snacks! Can you see who is on the bag?

Yes! The only thing tastier than delicious snacks from The Baker's Dog is being able to look at a picture of myself as I eat them!

I approve.

And my picky sissy goes goofy for them.



And then me and my sibs were caught in the act of conspiring. Our lips are sealed as to what we were up to.

Nothing involving a plan to hypnotize the apes were our amazing eyes. I swear. (Though lamb shanks were purchased. I'm just saying.)


I need to beware of working with this crew, though. They are not reliable partners.

And then I let my brudder go to the dog park to play with his buddy Tuchuck and be ignored by Chuck's sister Narra.

Chuck brought his brudder, er, foster brudder (right guys?) Theo to the park for his coming out party! (I mean coming out in public, right guys?) And now Oscar has a NEW BESTIE!

Oscar loves him some cookie faces.

Especially the new guy.

I think they are going to run away to Vermont and get married.

If Oscar can catch him.


But, Theo, before you get too confident about your love that dare not bark its name, just remember--there's no love....


Like brudderly love.

The drawback of the puparazzi--I get caught sharing the snuggle ball with my brudder.

Happy burpday, Sophie's ape!

Good Night, Graham

Sophie's brother Graham Riggins did not make it. We miss you, big guy, even if you fell in with a rough crowd, becoming besties with Tan Torkelson. I am sad you did not get to run free with Sophie and her mom for longer but trust me that your memory--and your gas--will linger on.

For Graham

This is for my friend Graham Riggins, known as the baby brother of Sophie Brador. I am staring intently into the camera so as to beam part of my brain to him in Canada. He is feeling quite poorly and I'd like to share some of my perfectly firing neurons. It is quite selfish of me to hog this gigantic brain.

Also, I am sharing a bit of my heart with his mom who also needs some extra love and I've got some extra heart so I might as well!

Make a Wish!

This a.m. we went for walkies and we saw this! (Not this exactly as my ape is not coordinated enough to handle a camera with three dogs) Since you're supposed to make a wish when you see a shooting star I wished for another one of those lamb legs! My ape thinks that maybe I did not use my wish wisely but she's never had a lamb leg.

Taking Care of My Ticker

So I told you that Saturday I had to go to the vet. It was a surprise visit because I was feeling poorly. I did not sleep Friday night and I was clearly uncomfortable Saturday even though I am stoic and don't complain very much. My ape knew what it probably was. I have had cardiomyopathy for awhile now. That means my heart valves and heart muscles are not perfect (even though the rest of me is) and my heart has been working harder and getting progressively larger over time. Eventually it leads to congestive heart failure which is where I am now. You can read about the problem here. There were some telltale signs.

One was that I was uncomfortable at night which we now know is from having the fluid in my chest pool on one side making breathing more difficult. As you can see I was not my usual peppy self. I was coughing and wheezing a bit and couldn't get comfortable.

Also if you look at my eyes they look droopy but that is really just noticeable because my mucous membranes are so pale because my ticker is having a hard time pumping my blood.

And then you can see that I am looking a little skinny in the rear. That's because they starve me. And I have lost 4 pounds since my last vet visit. But when I lie down I get a tummy pooch because I have fluid in my belly.

So I had to go to the vet to help my discomfort. The vet took some picture of my insides (that are not as pretty as my outsides.) Here are my gorgeous outsides:

Here's an approximation of my not so pretty insides:


There is almost no dark space in my chest because it is all taken up by my GIANT heart and built-up fluid. I am already taking a drug called Pimobendan that helps my heart beat more efficiently. And I have to take a diuretic that will help me pee out that extra fluid (and boy have I been peeing my little heart out! Er, big heart.). And I am taking an ACE inhibitor called enalapril. And the best part is that all the pills come in SNACKS! Now I just need to stay calm, get moderate exercise, and get plenty of rest. And peeing. As Patience pointed out, when the snow comes I will be able to write my name! And I am getting extra snacks and when I want a bed the peppy sheppys have to MOVE IT and I get to sleep in the people bed with my ma ape. Unfortunately my heart will not get better but I hope the new meds will make me more comfortable and I plan to MILK IT for all it is worth!


So I'm just going to live it up! And I am accepting all incoming smooches!

How Not to Use a Snuggle Bed (a photoessay)

My siblings have taken over my bed and THEY ARE DOING IT WRONG.



Yes, he was sleeping like that.

My Regularly Scheduled Health Crisis

That is how I am feeling.

I have a tendency to get sick around the holidays. One year I had spondy-losis and my back hurt and then I ate my whole sample pack of Rimadyl and spent almost 24 hours at the vet! Another year the vet detected an arrythmia at my checkup. Last year I had my first syncope (fainting spell). Right on schedule this year it was time for a vet checkup! I have been restless at night for several weeks and this morning I was feeling poorly. Off to see Dr. Teddy! I had some pictures taken of my heart and the diagnosis was: TOO ROMANTIC! Yes, my heart is so full of love it is taking up 2/3 of my chest cavity and it is causing fluid in my lungs.

So now I'm relaxing at home with some new pills. If I'm a little quiet it is just that I am supposed to get some rest. And also I'm supposed to eat one lamb leg every day. I'm pretty sure the vet said that.

Music Lesson

You might think that because I am advanced in years I am not hip to what the kids are doing and listening to these days but you could NOT be more wrong.



Indeed I am so hip that I am not just privy to Lady Gaga but to Lady Gaga covers. See:



(H/T Sophie Brador's ape.)

And those of you who are not as down with the kids may not know but me and my sibs are the topic of the new Britney song "3"



If you listen carefully to the lyrics you can hear "Countin' One Two Three/Ethel Oscar Wally/The Greatest Doggies/Everybody loves..." I'm sure this video is just goofin' and she'll soon be shooting the REAL video with One Two Three Ethel Oscar Wally!



This has been your lesson in Kids These Days.

Happy Burpday J Ape!

It is my J Ape's burpday so I am giving him his favorite thing--a picture of Wally! Happy burpday old man. Whenever I start to feel old I will look at you and think "at least I am not as old as him!" HAHAHAHA. Now I'm going to eat your cake.

Wally's No Good Weekend

I had a terrible weekend, thanks for asking. I'll recap it. First, we had snow. But it was not enough to eat or play in, just enough to make it muddy enough so I have to get my undercarriage wiped when I come in.

And then in spite of the weather my ape went to the SPCA and these gross things were there.


And she thought it was ok to cheat on me with wee ickle puppies.


And then there were assorted failed attempts to get a Holiday Card photo.

The pictures did capture something of our spirit.


Some of us were humiliated.

Others of us maintained our dignity.


And then the worst EVER! Nebraska lost to Tex-ass by a mere 13-12 with a last minute field goal! Last weekend my Saskatchewan Roughriders lost after a last minute field goal! I curse the uprights!


Here is my sissy watching the last second of the game:


And here is my sissy showing what she would do if she ran into a Longhorn (or one of those lousy refs)


I'm going to sleep through Monday and hope that Tuesday will bring better stuff.

Chompionship Time!

We are preparing for some chompionship football. There's a blanket of snow on the ground, dogs have been walked and fed.

And a special Husker Pie has been baked.


GO BIG RED!