MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

My BPP (Bull Pizzle Pal) GooberStan sent his good pal WooberWally an invaluable tool--a BPHT (Bull Pizzle Hunting Tool). He sent one to my buddy buddy IKE (also a BPP)

Can you see it?????


Yes, it is a CLEVER DISGUISE to make me look like a COW. Ike blogs about it on his blog. Here's how he looks in HIS BPHT (he says his eyes are red from a trip to the vet but I think it might be pizzle lust).



Yes, I guess Ike's waist is about the size of my neck. I would use this opportunity to suggest it might be my pizzle (and NOT my belly chub) getting in the way but this is a family blog. A very profane family that is discussing bull penises but still a family.

Here are the directions that came with the tool:



In short, our job is to LOOK like cows so that curious bulls will approach us and when they go to seal the deal--CHOMP! Fresh pizzle!

What do you think?



Could I pass?
To help in my search I have been researching the cows using the google and here is what I have found:

1) Cattles have ONE stomach with FOUR compartments. I need one of those!
2) Cattles chew their cud which is regurgitated stuff. So when the ma ape goes to clean up my barf so I don't eat it I can say "Back off my cud, ape!"
3) Cattles emit a lot of methane gas which is stinky and polluting. I already do that.
4) Cattles can get Mad Cow Disease! I think my sissy has that.

I hope this strategy will pay off. Thank you GooberStan! You shall share in the bounty of my hunting!