who let the dogs out?

this picture is on the front page of the new york times online addition. is this dog voting? power to the dogs! there IS hope...

waiting for returns

my sister and i are sitting around waiting for the election returns to roll in. let me just say i was nothing short of irate to find that i couldn't vote. as many of you may remember, last summer i won my canine good citizen certificate and yet, even though i showed up at the polling station with my certificate i didn't get to vote. WHAT? i don't mangle jokes, engage in pre-emptive strikes, poop in the house (that's for you, goddamn cats), or enviscerate the constitution. and yet you don't trust ME--a GOOD citizen--to vote.


here i am contemplating america's future. or a crumb of food that may or may not be trapped in the carpet.

my sister ethel finds more active ways to spend her time. here she is playing 'West Coast Offense' or 'Cornhusker football, the losing years.' Her favorite player Marlon Lucky not only caught a TD pass last weekend but threw one! awesome. her distraction technique has worked. i haven't thought about dirty tricks in the election in several minutes!


here my sister runs stairs with her squeaky football. that's how she keeps her svelte figure. but you can see the worry in her eyes. is she thinking about rebuilding america's middle east policy or is she just hypnotized by the squeaker in her ball?

here i am gnawing on the deceased remnants of one-party rule. democracy tastes so sweet.


if i close my eyes i can almost taste rick santorum's defeat. mmmmmm.

breaking news

dear dog. i don't know how we can be holding an election when the following breaking news was just announced--

britney spears is divorcing kevin federline.

this changes everything.

give me a home where the ephalants roam!

the philly zoo is giving away its ephalants! sadly, although i promised to take them with me on my daily walk and to the b-a-r-k-p-a-r-k on weekends, i am not one of the recipients. after a fight between the asian ephalant and african ephalants (i guess elephants are nationalist?) last year they got a lot of grief from picketers. so they're giving them to another zoo and a sanctuary where they will have more room to roam and fume over having been appropriated by the gop (and the alabama football team. how the hell is an elephant a "crimson tide)? enjoy your new homes, guys!

meet the griffon!

this is griffon! he lives in indiana but needs a home. he looks AWESOME. that mouth is just ready to be filled with snacks.

the story of the corgador (part one)

miss sunshade the superdale asked about the origin of the corgador, perhaps the finest creature to ever walk the earth (really, evolution, you can just stop now, there's nowhere to go but down from here). the corgador is a combination of corgi and labrador. now, this is entirely speculative since my true background is a mystery (other than i was found wandering the streets of yakima, washington with only a few patches of fur left, even fewer teeth, and looking a bit rough around the edges) but the likely combo package is a corgi and a lab. i hear my legs and my attitude are a dead giveaway for a corgi. i am bossy and i love to herd. my mawma was naturally drawn to the corgador (really, who isn't?) through an initial love of the corgi. i've posted pictures of conan, the dog who came before me. i get a little jealous sometimes because he was a stinkin' purebred. but my mawma assures me that she knows that mutts have got it goin' on.

perhaps someday i will fabricate a storied breed history of the corgador. until then, here's some pictures of stage one, moving toward the corgador. conan, the original corgi, who led to the birth of the corgador (figuratively barking, that is.)

here is wally, the corgador, demonstrating the wonder that is the mutt. i don't need no stinkin' pedigree.


here is conan, a corgi original. note the finely perfected napping form, maximizing both his napping capacity and his cuteness factor. this genetic trait of corgis will resurface in wally, combined with the snore of a bulldog and the drool of a mastiff.


conan again, this time displaying his lovely satellite dish ears, a trait not passed on to wally. and he also appears to wear a little too much eye make-up. regardless, you see the same spark of intelligence in his eyes, later to be replicated in wally. conan's bossy qualities, used for the procurement of snacks and often involving herding his people by nipping at their heels, are reproduced in wally three-fold leading to the ultimate Boss.

it's a nearly perfect process of evolution to arrive at wally. it's so perfect, in fact, that i might suspect an intelligent designer, were i not convinced that i'm the most intelligent thing in the universe.

the MuTT test

i got this link from ms. shelley jackson (a fantastic writer) on wall-o-weenie. when it said a MuTT test i though it was a test to determine if you belong to the greatest club on earth, the mutts! but actually it asks "what kind of a mutant are you?" and you can do a test to find out!

here is what my test said, i am shocked by how accurate it is (see highlighted bits). what kind of a mutant are YOU?

You are a: THORACOPAGUS
or OMPHALOPAGUS




You and your twin are joined at the belly or chest; you share certain organs, including, possibly, your heart.



Like other people, you talk to yourself. Unusually, yourself talks back. You are in a life-long conversation with yourself, one so rich and scintillating that you are sometimes annoyed when other people try to get in on it—as of course they do, sensing that something interesting is being discussed. You can afford to rebuff them. You do not need them, you are your own best company. When you need comfort, you can snuggle up against yourself. When you need advice, you can give it. You could spend a lifetime locked in an embrace with yourself, smiling into your own eyes. You have found the perfect love. Your literary form is the sonnet.

You are related to...
Guadalupe y Josefina Hinojosa,
born in Havana, Cuba in 1912.

dogbloggers beware!

crap-killer squirrels! and it's not even a wall-o-weenie joke!

OIL CITY, Pa. (AP) — Letter carriers occasionally have to deal with angry dogs or maybe even a spider's nest in a mailbox, but a mean squirrel?

Barb Dougherty, a 30-year Postal Service employee, said she was attacked and bitten Monday by a squirrel while delivering mail in Oil City, about 75 miles north of Pittsburgh.

"It was a freak thing. It was traumatic," Dougherty told The Derrick in Oil City. "I saw it there on the porch, put the mail in the box and turned to walk away and it jumped on me."

a corgador for YOU

all right, sarabera has been on petfinder FOREVER and i don't understand why. she's a corgador or a gorgi. and she's lovely. listen to this description:

Despite her age, Sara Bera is a happy, healthy and very active companion, who is as sweet and loving (except with some men) as she is beautiful. She's perfect material for a calendar cover gir! From her big brown eyes to her plume tail, she is a head-turner in any setting. HOWEVER, Sara Bera must have had some unpleasant experiences with men in the past because she can be at times unpleasant when confronted by men she doesn't know (although she does fine with some). Other than that, she's got everything going for her except a home! She's good with other dogs and cats and she will smother her human with kisses.

she sounds aweseome! we have much in common, we're old, beautiful, and experience a bit of misandry from time to time. so please, someone go get her.