Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Sponsor a starving dog

I would like to alert you to a dire situation. As many of you may know, I have been on a diet for about a million years. My ma ape says I need to keep my weight down for the good of my ticker and my spondy-losis of the spiney-losis.

But I am slowly going mad with the hunger.

I have been reduced to foraging for my own food.

Eating salads. And not even with arugula!

The problem has spread to my sissy who is hallucinating that my ma ape's foot is a chicken back.

And my baby brudder has been reduced to eating tennis balls as if they were ice cream cones.

Nom nom.

For only four pounds of meat per day you could sponsor one of these dogs (me first!) and ensure that they do not go to bed hungry. Look at these sad faces, how can you sleep at night knowing it has been three days since they have had ice cream?

Brother, can you spare a Wallymelon?

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Blogger Sophie Brador said...

Wally! I ain't no brother, but I am a sista, and I am willing to spare any meat I can find. Problem is, I can't find any. My mean, mean ape has me on a diet too. Seafood. Seafood! I did get a a marrow bone today. There's no marrow left, but you can have the bone part if you want.


8:41 PM  
Blogger Gus said...

Wally: I will try to sell some stuff on e-bay and send you my pay pal funds. Do you have an account of your own?


8:41 PM  
Blogger Peanut said...

We've still got some wallymelon from grammie's visit. Come on down

9:24 PM  
Blogger Emily and Ike said...

That is disgusting ... sob ... you can come live with me! Leave that nasty ma ape a giant dump in her shoe from me. This abuse will not be tolerated! Hell no we wont ... um, uh, not get ice cream!

10:38 PM  
Blogger Asta said...

My PooPoow Wally
You can movein wif me and eatallmy food anytime..i have wally melon and fwostypaws..and I sawsome cheese and pate in the fwidge..between the two of us ,we can open it ..huwwy
smoochie kisses

10:59 PM  
Blogger the Corgi Girls said...

Come over to our place Wal... we had FISHIES the other day, whole fishies! We get wallymellon too, no restrictions ;o)

M & I

12:29 AM  
Blogger Molly the Airedale said...

Dad took us out for ice cream last night, Wally! Come on over and we'll convince him to take us all out again tonight!

Love ya lots,
Maggie and Mitch

3:53 AM  
Blogger Dexter said...

I'd love to help you, but the foodables are pretty slim here too. I've been supplementing with rabbit poop.


5:28 AM  
Blogger Lola Smiles said...

Dudes! I can totally relate..my ape is doing the same to me but she manages to sneak me a very teenie amount of peanut butter from time to time..the sad eyes & drool tactics always work!

8:33 AM  
Blogger Simba and Jazzi said...

This is terrible1 You poor dogs. I am going to send you a wally melon, unless I forget and eat it first.

Simba x

9:36 AM  
Blogger Nancy at the Farm said...

Where did you get the strength to write your entry? And where are you getting your ice cream? I want some!

Love, Dozer

10:14 AM  
Blogger Nazila Merati said...


I have a few legs of lamb dated 2005 in the freezer. Will those do?


nm and ernest

10:49 AM  
Blogger Amber-Mae said...

This is so heartbreaking. I will sponsor you some kibbles that have been kept in the cupboard since last year. Still edible for you?

Butt wiggles,
Solid Gold Dancer

11:35 AM  
Blogger Ferndoggle said...

I haven't had a chicken back in a week! We need to run away to a chicken farm and eat till our hearts content.


1:48 PM  
Blogger Joe Stains said...

I feel like crying after reading this. seriously dude, the horror.

8:56 PM  
Blogger Pippa said...

What is ice cream? You lot don't know how lucky you are. Stop moaning and going for the sympathy vote.

You are having none of mine, food or sympathy. I am still pizzaless.


PS I said pizzaless, not pizzleless so don't get confused

3:35 AM  
Blogger the Corgi Girls said...

Wal! Your in our blog today! ;o) We love ya pal!

M & I

11:11 AM  
Blogger Stanley said...


As they said in the 60s... you ain't heavy... you're my brother!

All of the leftovers in GooberStan are yours, man... IF there ever are any.

Goober love & smooches (live on love, man!),

12:11 AM  

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