Saturday, March 29, 2008

Your Cheatin' Heart

So my ma ape has been neglecting me. But now it has gotten worse. Do you remember two weeks ago when Elliot Spitzer, the governor of New York, had to have that totally embarrassing press conference where he had to get up and admit he'd been visiting prostitutes. Well, it' time for my ma ape to FESS UP because I know she has been CHEATING ON ME. I found dog hairs on her collar. Smelled belly rubs on her hand. Could see dried smooches on her cheeks.

First, let me remind you what she has at home. Cute:


Cuterest:


And then I found this on her camera:


Look at that attention hound! I could do that for her at home!


He thinks he's special cuz he has a big head.


And a grotesquely large tongue.

And this guy thinks it is cute to stick his snout in the camera.


That hangdog face. Pa-thetic.


And look at this spazzy girl.


Oh, and I suppose this guy thinks he's cute. What-ever! Everyone knows I have the corner on the big headed black dog market.


Turns out my ma ape went to the SPCA with Narra's ape to walk the dogs and take pictures. Guess who had to stay home. Me and sissy spent all day keeping interlopers away by shouting at them. And this is the thanks we get.

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15 Comments:

Blogger Ruby Bleu said...

I say pee in her bed...it is inexcusable!

Lots of Licks, Ruby

8:20 PM  
Blogger Peanut said...

my mom says your ma ape needs to get that boxer and send him to us.

9:06 PM  
Blogger Stanley said...

Woober!

What is UP with the ma ape, man? Are you giving her enough lovin' or is she simply "playing the field?" Any way you slice it, while it's nice for the dogs at the SPCA, it's killing her Wally Boy.

Have a talk with her before it REALLY gets out of control and she brings another one home (unless you WANT another sib).

Goober love & sympathetic smooches,
Stanley

9:13 PM  
Blogger H.A. Turbofire, Sibertarian said...

Humans can be so inconsiderate!

9:16 PM  
Blogger Randi said...

Geez Wally Tamale...what's up with your ma-ape? The least she can do is trick you both out with kongs filled with peanut butter before she leaves to commit doggie adultery...but at least she's being nice to the pups over at the SPCA....you gotta give her credit for that..

I think you should start waking her up at night again so she can sleep on the floor with you..just to remind her you need her 'round the clock!

love & licks,
Randi

ps..if that doens't work..you & ETHEL can come live in sunny so.cal with me...

9:18 PM  
Blogger Gus said...

Wally my pal...this is serious stuff. Hoomans should be faithful, or at the very least, she owes you an apology and explanation. We know she is trying to do good for the spca doggies, but she is negelecting you - seriously and Ethel too!

Ruby's idea bears consideration, or you could go out two or three times a night like Teka does.

keep us posted, If you need help, Teka will be glad to come.

10:03 PM  
Blogger Lorenza said...

Hi, Wally!
I think your have to forgive your Ma Ape this time. Its not that she was cheating on you. She was there for a good cause.
We all know she has the best at your house!
Kisses and hugs
Lorenza

10:30 PM  
Blogger Patience-please said...

Humans. Hmmmph. Just when you think you finally have them trained, they up and go all cheaty pants on you.

sad, head shaking wags from the whippets

11:22 PM  
Blogger Mack said...

My mom does the EXACT SAME THING!
OMD does it ever make me mad! You know what's even worse - when she donates toys to the SPCA!! Toys that I absolutely would have LOVED to destroy.!!

12:38 AM  
Blogger Jacks, Narra, Tuchuck, and Rousseau said...

Hey, Wally Tamale! We should consider ourselves lucky for now--at least they're not bringing any of those homeless dogs HOME! We don't know about you and Ethel, but we don't have any more room!!!

J&N

1:03 AM  
Blogger Molly the Airedale said...

We see lots of cute faces there, Wally! Maybe you'll get a new brother or sister??!!

Love ya lots,
Maggie and Mitch

4:53 AM  
Blogger Dexter said...

Oh the horror! Add she even took photos to tease you with. Bad human.

5:23 AM  
Blogger Emily and Ike said...

Oh, my! Too bad all those dogs are homeless.
Ike

11:36 AM  
Blogger Amber-Mae said...

You definitely need to have some serious talk to her...

Love licks,
Solid Gold Dancer

12:14 PM  
Blogger Joe Stains said...

are you going to be like patsy cline and stand by your hu-man or like Michael Jackson and tell her to BEAT IT!

5:47 PM  

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