Thursday, August 11, 2011

Great Google-y Moogly!

Otis the Potus here.  This week I decided to check the little Doohickey McThing on our blog that tells us what searches people are performing in order to arrive at our blog.  This was a terrible idea as it revealed to me what you naked apes are thinking.  You are all awful, really the worst.  Here is what I saw via this little window into your minds:

Rent a Dog

Rent?  No you may own.  Take this dog on the left, please.

Terrible mothers in history and Mommy Dearest

Looking for our ma ape, we see.

Wally lane.

Yes, we live on Wally Lane, though for some reason the pizzas I order to have delivered here never quite make it.

Everybody loves a big ass.

This is true.  Junk, meet trunk.

Snow Wally.

We've got that.

Pooly Dogs

Is this what you're looking for?  My brother in his bathing garb?

Identifying a mutt test

Trying to get smarter?  OK, here's your test:  Which dog is a handsome devil?  (A: Trick question, handsome on the right, devil on the left.)

Another test:  Which mutt is a lady?  (Another trick question:  Neither.  My sissy is no lady!)  

Crime against animality:  Our ape was delighted that the first page this phrase leads you to is an article by Jacques Derrida, granddad of deconstruction.  The second link was us.  We're pretty sure this is what Mr. Derrida was referring to:

Mango ness


Oh my.  Coming to our blog looking for a pair of mangoes?

 Or wondering how this handsome brindle boy displays his resemblance to Mango?

All right, all right.  We know from your USUAL searches you are looking for that Mango-ness that none of us gentlemen here have.  The Mango Ness:

 All right, naked apes, there are your search results.  Now you can get back to your googling of bottoms and sheppys in bikinis and what I know you were looking for.

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Blogger Nancy at the Farm said...

LMAO! This may be one of the greatest posts of all time. Mum is sending it around the office. You boys are wicked cool. And we will take Edgarrr if no one else puts a bid in on him.

Love, Dozer and Cooper

9:50 AM  
Blogger Kari in Alaska said...

Rent a dog???


11:07 AM  
Blogger Dexter said...

Otis! Dude! You are totally an excellent Mango-ness. I checked my keyword searches...

brocoli plant
labranards (as if)
22 flaps mango (wtf)
buffalo bones of the beast (must have been Lacie)


6:22 PM  
Blogger Moose said...

BOL- people are weird! momma is always clearing the search history on her phone because sometimes she looks at it and even she thinks she is weird!
I wish we could tell what those apes were thinking! Maybe not!

10:46 AM  
Blogger Jed and Abby in MerryLand said...

OMD! Who knew there were so many 'naked Otis' links on Google [besides you]!? Deeply disturbing. We for sure think you've got the essence of Mango-ness; you're just missing the actual mangoes, like most of us dudes [that's Jed speaking] out here in Blogville.

We've read about those 'rent a dog' perverts - mostly in California, we think. What's next: rent a kid? There ought to be a law!

Jed & Abby

9:47 PM  

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