Taking Applications

The New York Times has a story on the rise in popularity of pet cookbooks since the Menu foods recall since, well, we now know that our food can kill us. And look! The story has a picture of a corgi (I think) to illustrate dogs who ought to be eating well. So, in order to facilitate my feeding, I'm taking applications for a personal chef because my ma has a whole shelf full of vegetarian cookbooks but no MEAT AND WALLYMELON AND BANANAS cookbook. What's up with that?

The story includes this snotty comment:

Most recipes in the books differ somewhat from human fare. Take, for example, the “Better Food for Dogs” presentation of Barbecued Hamburgers: “Cut burgers and buns into bite-size pieces. In a serving bowl, combine burgers, buns, tomato, lettuce, oil, potassium chloride and supplements. Mix thoroughly.” (None of the recipes suggest garnishes or wine pairings.)

Of COURSE there's no wine pairings. Everyone knows dogs drink beer.