Thursday, July 09, 2009

Don't Badger Me


So this story came through my e-mail today:

BERLIN (Reuters) - A badger in Germany got so drunk on over-ripe cherries it staggered into the middle of a road and refused to budge, police said Wednesday. A motorist called police near the central town of Goslar to report a dead badger on a road -- only for officers to turn up and discover the animal alive and well, but drunk.

Police discovered the nocturnal beast had eaten cherries from a nearby tree which had turned to alcohol and given the badger diarrhoea. Having failed to scare the animal away, officers eventually chased it from the road with a broom.


I have asked my media team to release the following statement:

A spokesperson for Wally T. Corgador categorically denies the veracity of stories that the badger was seen earlier in the evening at a Berlin karaoke bar with a corgador wearing a "Don't Hassle the Hof" t-shirt while both ate fermented cherry pie and sang power ballads. Also the "W" is for Wally, not Wisconsin or Dubya.

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15 Comments:

Blogger The Great Rock Eater said...

I believe you Wally!! You can't trust anything the media publishes anymore! A little photoshop and they can make anything happen they want! Stand strong Wally =)

6:56 AM  
Blogger Gus said...

That Badger is NOT from Wisconsin. They can drink anything and not get soused.

gussie d

7:39 AM  
Blogger Sophie Brador said...

I can't believe they didn't give that badger and greasy hamburger and a tylenol. After a night of partying with a corgador, you'd have one wicked headache!

xo
SB

8:33 AM  
Blogger Randi said...

Wow Wally - the media will just get you every time...I completely believe you...cuz if you were eating all those cherries, your lips would be taking on a more red color & then I'd just have to give you a big smooch...but I'd have to get to you before my mom/secretary does, cuz she loves you almost as much as I do...

Anyway..I hope they get that poor badger into some type of self-help program...food addiction & alcoholism is a nasty mix of troubles!

Oh...My mom & dad LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE little Sam from SPCA Saturday...can we get him FED-EXed to us????

Love & Licks,
Randi

9:37 AM  
Blogger Dozer and Coop said...

You should be okay until your Mum gets a copy of the police report. I'd be packing my bags if I were you!

Love, Dozer

9:40 AM  
Blogger Moco said...

And that's your story and your sticking to it. Damn the evidence.

9:47 AM  
Blogger Jacks, Narra, Tuchuck, and Rousseau said...

WOOHOO, GO Badgers!!!

10:57 AM  
Blogger Jake of Florida said...

Pawsonally, we don't believe anything we read or hear -- unless it's from our Mom or Dogdad.

Ain't hardly nothing true no more...

We have some bing cherries in the fridge -- if we take them out and let them sit awhile, will we be able to reproduce the same effects?

Plausible deniability -- remember!!!

Jake and Just Harry

11:36 AM  
Blogger Khyra The Siberian Husky And Sometimes Her Mom said...

Gussie is soooo funny!

I think there are still some cherries at the top of our tree!

If woo bring a really really REALLY tall ladder woo khould get 'em!

Hugz&Khysses,
Khyra

12:38 PM  
Blogger Woodrow, Sweetie, MJ Campanella said...

;) too funny

woodrow sweetie mj

3:01 PM  
Blogger Brownie said...

That is SO funny! BOL! We believe you 1000%, Wally!

3:02 PM  
Blogger Asta said...

Wally
Thank you fow clawifying that stowy..I believe youw vewsion.Hope youw head isn't huwting
smoochie kisses
ASTA

4:08 PM  
Blogger Peanut said...

The media lies. Lies I say

5:05 PM  
Blogger Joe Stains said...

uh oh, you might need an aspirin or 3 soon my friend...

8:57 PM  
Blogger Mango said...

Wally, watch out there, you don't want to get a WUI (waddling Under the Influence). Just try not to spin out of control or travel in the wrong lane and you should be fine.

Slobbers,
Mango

P.S. Wonder how you can tell a drunken sheppy from a "normal" one?

6:35 AM  

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